Kiss My Ass


He isn’t even in my life anymore and Mr. Whitewater is still finding ways to make me miserable. Clearly telling me I wasn’t worth his time energy or feelings just wasn’t enough for him! How could I have been so blind?! he isn’t a fucking man he is a damn child! How could I have been so wrong about someone I thought was so perfect? He was never worth my tears that was for sure. I was willing to do anything to make what happened right, to earn his respect again, to make him happy and he had absolutely no problem trowing me to the curb like it was nothing. The son of the bitch still wears the $100 Hei Matau necklace I bought him though. He literally refused to be civil in any capacity even though we have to see each other and we have the same friends. Hell his friends (the ones he told thought I was crazy) still hangout with me, invite me place and talk to me all the time. They said the day after our big fight he came in telling anyone who would listen to him about it. That is not what he told me though, he told me a couple people saw a “bruise” and he only told them…. fucking liar. Lol he swore he wasn’t like other guys bhaha he swore he was different. But that was just another damn lie because as soon as things got hard he peaced out. I forgot though he is fucking perfect and never makes mistakes!

And guys wonder why girls have issues with them…



Never Say Never


Ok two second update: I swallowed my pride and said I was sorry the other night. He (Mr.Whitewater) told me if I pulled something like that again he was done. He said if we were going to date then i needed to at least try and open up…. I agreed to try. Which leads me to the actually reason I’m writing this today…


Last night a bunch of us had a fire and were drinking and just hanging out. No big deal. We played some game called stump, which involves throwing a hammer up catching it and how ever you catch it is how you have to hold it when you try to hammer someone else’s nail into the stump. Drunk people should not play this game is all I’m saying lol. Anyway Mr. Whitewater had to be up really early this morning so at about midnight or so him and I leave the party. I’m drunk but not hammered just drunk and happy… and horny (go figure).Mind you we had just had sex a couple hours ago when I went home for lunch…

We get back to his place and I strip and just climb in bed, he got the hint. And it didn’t take long before we were having sex. Thats when he flips me on to my stomach, which normally I totally cool with getting it from behind. Next thing I know his hand is in that one place I said I would never let anything go… Naturally I tried to stand up I mean I kinda freaked can you blame it was the first time anyone had ever even tried that! he kept me pinned to the bed and managed to stay inside me the whole time. He whispers in my ear just relax… RELAX are you kidding me!? You are trying to put your finger in my ass and you want me to relax!!!! I give the guy credit though.. he actually got me to relax and next thing I know his finger is in me.

he was sweet about it though. I means sweet as a guy can be when he has his dick in you and his finger in your ass. He asked if I was ok if I wanted him to sot pro keep going. I’m not sure why I said I was fine and agree to let him try it with his dick but I did. Maybe it was alcohol maybe I was just curious maybe he he I trust him more than I realized but regardless of what it was I let him do the one thing I swore I would never let anyone do. Its and interesting feeling to say the least I’m not sure if I like it or not yet. Its different thats for sure. When we finished all I could say for a couple minutes was I feel like you just took  my second virginity hahahaha.

Well I can cross another thing off my list I guess.