So I am definitely not the girl that you look at and think yep she is super outdoorsy butttt I did go camping for the first time last week. Not only did I go camping but I went camping with Mr. Whitewater! I seriously had the best time who knew camping was so much fun. The best part though was the tent sex.
So we were all sitting around passing a bottle of Makers smoking hookah and talking, I was sitting between his knees and he was playing with my hair. At some point he reaches around and pulls me into his lap and whispers lets go to bed. He takes my hand and I follow him to our little tent. (Side note: it was kinda hot watching him be all mountain man like, setting up the tent using an ax to chop wood and then building a fire). We get in the tent and he starts kissing my neck. Thats about the point I busted out laughing because we could hear the people next to us having sex! They were not the least bit concerned with not being loud. This kinda ruined our mood not because we could hear them but because I wanted to go stop them from hooking up. Before you judge me and call me a cock block hear me out… the girl in the tent has a boyfriend that lives in Ireland. I know she is super into him but he was blackout drunk and lets be serious when you are that drunk and you want it well there isn’t much stopping you. Anyway Mr. Whitewater said to let them go that they were both adults and knew what they were doing, thats also about the time his hands slide into my shorts. Needless to say I forgot about the other couple pretty quick.
The thing about tent sex is there really isn’t much room so we had to a little creative lol. If any of y’all ever find yourselves in a went having sex the best position is girl on top. Oh yea and put a fan in the tent! So I’m on top of him and we are in this little tent and its raining out basically it was kinda like the movies but sluttier haha! The last time I looked at the clock that night it was 5:30am and that was between rounds one and two. Yea I got next to no sleep but it was so worth it. Also between the rounds we stepped out of the tent into the rain to cool off and yes it was cheesy but still kind of cute… He pulled me into his arms and kissed me really deeply in the pouring rain. Swoon haha. I’m not kidding sometimes I think this guy stepped right out of a movie with some of the things he says and does. So far everything with him is really good but Mr. Cali is still in the back of mind… I might have to vent about that here soon so I’m just going to say sorry now! Until next time..
The other day I was at a conference in Uptown Charlotte (yes we really call our “downtown” uptown) and I had to be there early to help set up and do names tags. Once all that is done we go in and take our seats. No kidding 5 mins later a good work friend of mine are “going to the bathroom”. In all reality we were walking across the street to Connelly’s Irish Pub. The presentations were going to be boring anyway so why not go to the bar and sneak back in during the reception!
We are sitting on the patio talking and drinking when all of a sudden there is a guy beside me introducing himself. He says his name and goes I’d really like to take you to lunch sometime text me and put its business card down in front of me. He then turn and walks out of the bar with his friends. It happened so fast I swear I had the most confused look on my face. A. because that stuff never happens to me and B. because he did that and than actually left the bar. I couldn’t even really tell you what he looked like, he looked tall but then again I was sitting down and I think he had dirty blonde hair. Other than that I’ve got nothing but the info on his card. (he has a good job)
I did end up texting him the next day just to kind of feel it out and to be honest he is kinda boring. Plus he put )))) in every single message and I don’t understand why he just won’t use punctuation! After a few glasses of wine last night I asked him about the ))) he said it was like smiley faces so logically my next two responses were 1. where are the eyes? 2. if there are a lot of )))) does that mean a bigger smile? He tells me he doesn’t know because he has never put so much thought into and that its just a way to show emotion in text… BITCH THAT’S WHAT EMOJIS ARE FOR!! At this point I seriously doubt I will actually go meet him but hey I give him credit for doing what he did at the bar.
First off Mr. Off Limits is getting a new name since that one no longer fits and I’m going with Cali Boy because thats where he is from. Lol now that that is settled lets talk about last night…
I go out with some co-workers for a beer after work. Around 730 I get a call and its Cali Boy he wants to know if I want to go to Triple C to grab a beer and a grilled cheese from the Papi Queso. OF COURSE I DID! First of all I really can’t get enough of this boy secondly I love that brewery and that food truck. We were wrapping up where I was so I agreed to meet him. We meet up and he drives to the brewery. We have a few beers, get our grilled cheese and just talk. I could talk to him for hours about anything and everything. He even managed to calm me down when my sent sent me a text that sent my stress levels through the roof. Since its a brewery last call was at 9 so we headed back to his place pretty early.
He had to take his dog out when we got there and while he was doing that I walked in his closet, stripped and put on one of his white dress shirts and my heels, risky business style (with no socks or sunglasses). I heard him open the front door so i walked out of his room, the look on his face was priceless to say the least. He takes the leash off the dog in record time and before I knew it he picked me up and put me on the counter. It was on from there. We did finally make it to his bed but not before he had pinned me to every wall along the way. We had that hair pulling, back scratching kind of sex. The best part about sex with him is that he can get me more than once. Thankfully his room mate wasn’t home because he definitely would have heard us… well he would have heard me. We did finally pass out but at some point in the middle of the night, I’m getting woken up by a hand between my legs. Round 2…
Saying I’m play with fire might be an understatement… In the past 72 hours I feel like my dating life spiraled out of control.
1. Mr. Off Limits and I no longer have to sneak around and its so different to see him with this I don’t care who see’s us attitude
2. I got obliterated Sunday off of Whiskey and poured my heart out to an ex, and now they want me to come see them this weekend (we live in different states)
3. Mr. Bad News hit on me in front of his ex girlfriend who I know for a fact still has feelings for him and calls him “the one”
Ok so the third one isn’t really that important it just threw me off. The first two though have my head spinning. So I’m going to make kind of pros and cons list..
Mr. Off Limits (still haven’t thought of a new name): Not really my type looks wise but I love his personality. I love that I can just be myself with him. He doesn’t care if I’m rocking sweats and sports bra with no make up or if I’m dressed to the nines and hitting the town with girls. He always has me laughing and he keeps interested which is hard to do because I get bored with guys fast. He is older than me which is nice. He never gets mad at me for being young or immature. Like he wasn’t even the least bit mad about how drunk I was Sunday he came and picked me up and take me home and took care of me. He never cares when I’m out and I blow his shit up (yes I’m that girl sometimes). He talks shit with me and doesn’t always let me win which wins you major point with me. The sex is amazing. He had me figured out pretty quick and he even knows some of the weird things like in bed and he does them. He has no problem slamming into a wall, catching me off guard and going at it right there but he can also be sweet about it. An the fact that we don’t have to sneak around his room mate anymore is great. Last night we went down to his place while his room mate was still up, talked with them for a little while and then went to his room and fucked while they were in the living room. He hasn’t done that in the 4 months we have been doing whatever it is we are doing. I was shocked to say the least! This morning he snoozes his alarm rolls over, starts kissing my shoulders which leads to some great morning sex. A girl can’t really complain…
The ex: I guess I should start out by telling you this ex of mine is a girl… so theres that. She isn’t really my type when it comes to looks either and everyone tells me that when they see old pictures of us. But again her personality wins me over. I can’t help but smile when I’m with her. She is everything I have ever wanted in a person and relationship. I compare everyone to her. I know I love her I always will love her. But I’m not sure it can work because we are in two different places in our lives. She wants to settle down get a place with someone a dog, she doesn’t like to go out and it drives her nuts that I go out. And we live in different states so one of us is going to have to give up everything and that someone is me. She wants me to come see her this weekend but I’m not sure it is a good idea because I know if I see her my heart will melt and I’ll be putty. She can still do that to me after all theses years and all our fights and trust me I could start a blog on just the roller coaster ride that was our relationship. She is a great girl, motivated, loving, caring, accepting… she inspires me to be a better person honestly. But I’m afraid we have to much of a past to wipe the slate clean.
My ex has no idea that I’ve been kinda seeing Mr. Off Limits for a couple months and if she found out she would never speak to me again. It would break her if she knew. I’m not trying to destroy her I swear. I don’t know what to do I kind of want to see where things with Mr. Off Limits will go (even though everyone Blakley included says I can do better than him). But to do that I’m going to have to break the heart of the one person who has loved me and been there for me through some of the hardest times. Thank you Jack Daniels for helping into this mess that I have no clue how to get out off. When you play with fire someone always gets burned… always
END OF VENT…
So after an epic Saturday night with great friends there is nothing better than a good sunday funday. Our Sunday Funday started out innocently enough brunch and a couple bloody marys some how turned into double jack and diets. Now there are a couple reason I don’t normally drink whiskey; 1. I get emotional 2. I get super hammered. Both of these things happened this sunday.
After a couple jacks I felt the need to call my ex and pour out my feelings. Mine you we had probably one of the worst break ups of my life. We dated for the better part of 3 years, broke up for a year and this past year tried it again but I just couldn’t ever get my shit together to make it work. We are in two different parts of our lives. The only problem is I’m still and always will be head over heels in love with them. Sober I would never admit this but sunday I did. I sat outside the bar crying and telling them I loved them and missed them…. classy I know. Thankfully I have a good friend who decided it was time to take my phone away. Thank god for sunglasses I put them back on and went back to my friends like nothing had happened.
When I get back to the table though guess who is sitting there…. Mr. Bad News from months ago!! I haven’t seen him since Halloween night when I was dressed like Tom Cruise from Risky Business and we fucked all over his house. I’m talking crazy drunk sex all over his house. So crazy I managed to lose my silver Michael Kors watch somewhere. For moths I have been asking for it back and he never had time to meet me with it. Of course he doesn’t have time to see me after I tell him I ‘m not going to hook up with him anymore…. Typical guy. And to add insult to injury one of my friends (the one who slept with Mr. Off Limits’s room mate saturday night) and Mr. Bad News use to have a pretty serious thing about a year ago and she to this day doesn’t know him and I hooked up this fall. Yep I’m a horrible friend I know! In my defense thats why I called it off after Halloween because he didn’t tell her.
Ok so if you are completely confused I’m sorry let me try to recap… I’m hammered off whiskey with a group of friends, I’ve poured my heart out to my ex and now an ex fling is sitting at our table with his ex girlfriend/best friend who knows nothing about our said fling…
I go give him a hug and say hi and he hugs me back and hands me my watch! I go back to my side of the table and sit down and I’m sitting diagonal from him. I look up a couple times and he winks at me not once but several times, WTF. Even my friend to my right saw him do it. Dude your girl and my friend are sitting next to you!! I ignore him and then I check my phone because Mr. Off Limits is coming to pick me up and I had a text from Mr. Bad News had texted me saying he was jealous of the guy picking me up! Now I’m seriously fucking confused! Mr. Bad news hasn’t talked to me in months and the first time I see him he pulls this shit! Thankfully Mr. Off Limits showed up a few mins later to take my hammered ass home. And thats pretty much my last full memory sunday the next thing I know its 7am and I’m waking up in Mr. Off Limits bed (fully dressed). Talk about one hell of a Sunday Funday
I guess I should come up with a new name for him now because he isn’t so Off Limits anymore.
It was a weekend for the books to say the least. My liver pretty much hates actually I’m sure it has just decided to quit on me. But on a better note Mr. Off Limits is so off limits any more!
Saturday was spent drinking and dancing the night away for Blakley’s birthday. By 2:30 me and another friend we in a cab heading back to my apartment. Some how we ended up in Mr. Off Limits apartment instead of mine, go figure.
I can’t even begin to tell you what we all talked about but his room mate watched him and I go into his room together and its not like it matter much because he was in the process of taking my friend into his room. Yep thats right she had sex with someone she knew I slept with this summer. I’m not even mad about it because thanks to her now he knows that Mr. (not so) Off Limits and I have a thing. Sex from what I remember was amazing like always.
The next morning I wake up and check my phone and see like 5 messages from my friend in the other room saying she needed to go, my only response was “I’ll meet you in the middle”. I got up and searched for my clothes yes I had to search they were everywhere and then went to sit on the couch to wait for her to come out of the other room. We got a good laugh out this.
The best part of the morning though was when we were getting in the car to get brunch, this girl and guy walk out of the building and past our car. She was wearing his shirt, his shorts and had her leopard print heels on from the night before. And they didn’t get in a car they were walking towards the light rail! Hahahaha talk about the best walk of shame outfit everrrr! It would have been better if she would have worn her outfit from last night or just borrowed flip flops from him. Regardless if was the best way to start off one hell of a Sunday Funday.
IT’S MY BEST FRIENDS BIRTHDAYYYYYY. I can’t wait to see what the weekend holds for us! Happy Birthday Blakley I love you cupcake 🙂 I’m so glad we are best friends!