I was having a conversation a couple weeks ago with a friend and somewhere in the course of the conversation I made a comment about how I feel like the first couple times I sleep with someone that I doubt it is very good because I’m nervous and I don’t want  to push the limits to far to fast but I also don’t want to be boring in bed. The conversation quickly turned into talking about what was considered to much and what we think freaks guys out.

I’ll be the first to admit that I probably like freakier stuff then most. I’m ok with having someones hands around my throat (not for long), with being tied up, told what to do, smacked/spanked, toys… I think you get the picture. But it take me a while to feel comfortable enough with a person to actually admit to any of that. Lets be serious guts claim they are ok with all that but I’d say 50% probably aren’t. I asked a couple of guy friends once about it and basically what I gathered was that yea its ok but sometimes it makes the guy feel like you want all of that because just normal sex with him isn’t good enough. I guess I kind of understand that.

I can’t speak for other girls but for me that isn’t the case or at least up until I have never needed that stuff in bed because normal sex was boring. Actually  now that I think about it when the normal sex is really good thats when I really want to try more of the Dom/Sub sex. There is something really freeing about being completely submissive to someone. Some of the best orgasms I have ever had are from being barely touched. It’s all about the trust, the trust that he won’t hurt you and trusting that he is going to make you feel amazing. Being blind folded, told to lay on your with your back legs spread and not to move, because if you move it all stops, and you have no idea when, where or how he is going to touch you…. I mean damn. All the anticipation builds up and the slightest touch in the right spot and bam you are done.

I hate not being in control when if comes to pretty much everything but in the bed with the right person giving up that control is amazing. I haven’t had Dom/Sub sex in a while unfortunately. The closest I came was about 6 months ago with Mr. Whitewater. I had hinted that I wanted him to put his hand on my throat while he was on top of me. He literally stops and looks at me and says, “Alex I’m about to become a licensed EMT I can’t not choke you!” My response, “perfect if something goes wrong you will know what to do!” He did n’t find that as funny as I did and it still took him a while to warm up to the idea and we were probably having sex at minimum twice a day at this point. We broke up before we could “try” anything else.


I personally see nothing wrong with some 50 Shades of Gray sex. What about you, what is your take on Dom/Sub?


The Fighter


Well damn… last night was ummm something else to say the least. I decided I needed to get out of a funk so I was just going to start very casually dating. I mean super casual as in lets go grab dinner maybe a drink  and talk, no kissing no hooking up just hanging out. That was working out pretty well for me until last night. I have texting this guy for about two weeks but because of our schedules we had yet to met up. I met him on Tinder, go ahead and judge me for that. He got me to swipe right because of his pictures but I was more attracted to him because of what he said to me on tinder. I mean right off the bat he laid it out there that he didn’t really care what i did for a living or where i was from and that he had no intention of having that same boring cliche conversation. He asked me what my biggest fears are, what my passions are, what relationship screwed me up the most and other things along those lines. At first I was like whoa time out thats way to much. but he made a good point if you can’t tell a complete stranger something who can you tell. Next thing I know I am telling him things I don’t tell my friends. It was weird but very refreshing I was so open and honest about what I was saying and oddly relaxed about it. Fast forward about two weeks through on and off conversations and snap chats and we get to last night.

He asked me to go to dinner earlier in the day and I agreed. As it got closer and closer to me having to leave I was debating on bailing. I didn’t I showed up about 15 mins late but hey I went. Now keep in mind this guys knows a lot of personal stuff about me and my sex life. In my defense I never actually thought I would met him. You would think the conversation would be kinda awkward considering everything we had talked about before meeting but it wasn’t at all. We had a great conversation, you never would have guessed it was the first time we had hung out. He kept me laughing and smiling all night long and not the fake laugh and smile but I was actually having a really good time. We went out for drinks after dinner and we continued our great conversation just talking about anything and everything.

One thing we talked about a lot through text and last night was sex. I had already told him I had never had a one night stand and that it wasn’t my thing, hell I told him before we even met for dinner I wasn’t going to sleep with him last night. And he has this I don’t know what you would call it a rule I guess about if he sleeps with a girl on the first night he won’t see her again. Well we get back to my place and I’m sitting in my big over stuffed chair and he is on the couch. At some point he gets up and comes and sits on the chair with me. Did I mention he wasn’t wearing a shirt…OMGGGG he is a fighter/boxer so his body is amazing. I’m talking perfectly cut not to much but definitely cut to perfection. So anyway he is sitting on the chair with me and he was ridding my legs and I was across his back and through his hair while we talked. He leans over and starts making out with me. I was fucking done ha he was such a good kisser. This goes on for I don’t know 20ish mins before he moves me to the couch and climbs on top of me. At this point I am fighting the urge to rip his shorts off. I keep telling myself  “don’t be that girl, don’t be that girl”… well you can probably guess what happens…

We end up in my guest bedroom both of us trying really hard not to give in… We gave in and we gave in in spectacular fashion. The sex was seriously some of the best sex I have had in a long time. It was beyond clear that there was a connection there but in the back of my head when we were done I was think fuck did we just screw this up. Mind you at this point its 430 in the morning. I wake up this morning wondering if I would see or hear from him again, by 10am my question was answered… he didn’t ask he told me he was staying with me tonight and that he would see me after work. Now I get to send the rest of the day thinking about round 2 with The Fighter tonight.

Side note: he is the first person in 6 months to completely make me forget about Mr. Whitewater for a night, I’m taking that as a good sign.

The One Night Stand


I know this is going to sound shocking but i have never had one. Yes you read that right, I Alex have never had a one night stand… everyone I’ve hooked up with I have been dating or had feelings for. I have never just taken a random guy home from a bar or where ever, slept with him and never spoken to him again.

But apparently its something every girl should do once… or so my friends say. All this stuff with Mr. Whitewater has really fucked with my head (I’ll tell you about that tomorrow) that I am actually considering doing this. I think, maybe, I don’t know. Something about sleeping with a random guy just for the hell of it doesn’t sound like fun to me. What the fuck are you suppose to do in the morning lol?! What if its awkward? What if he is super small? What if he can’t kiss? Oh man lol the number of things that can go wrong seem endless. If someone could please explain to me what is so great about one night stands I am all ears but I think for right now I’m just going to stick with my vibrator until I find someone I want to date.

Never Say Never


Ok two second update: I swallowed my pride and said I was sorry the other night. He (Mr.Whitewater) told me if I pulled something like that again he was done. He said if we were going to date then i needed to at least try and open up…. I agreed to try. Which leads me to the actually reason I’m writing this today…


Last night a bunch of us had a fire and were drinking and just hanging out. No big deal. We played some game called stump, which involves throwing a hammer up catching it and how ever you catch it is how you have to hold it when you try to hammer someone else’s nail into the stump. Drunk people should not play this game is all I’m saying lol. Anyway Mr. Whitewater had to be up really early this morning so at about midnight or so him and I leave the party. I’m drunk but not hammered just drunk and happy… and horny (go figure).Mind you we had just had sex a couple hours ago when I went home for lunch…

We get back to his place and I strip and just climb in bed, he got the hint. And it didn’t take long before we were having sex. Thats when he flips me on to my stomach, which normally I totally cool with getting it from behind. Next thing I know his hand is in that one place I said I would never let anything go… Naturally I tried to stand up I mean I kinda freaked can you blame it was the first time anyone had ever even tried that! he kept me pinned to the bed and managed to stay inside me the whole time. He whispers in my ear just relax… RELAX are you kidding me!? You are trying to put your finger in my ass and you want me to relax!!!! I give the guy credit though.. he actually got me to relax and next thing I know his finger is in me.

he was sweet about it though. I means sweet as a guy can be when he has his dick in you and his finger in your ass. He asked if I was ok if I wanted him to sot pro keep going. I’m not sure why I said I was fine and agree to let him try it with his dick but I did. Maybe it was alcohol maybe I was just curious maybe he he I trust him more than I realized but regardless of what it was I let him do the one thing I swore I would never let anyone do. Its and interesting feeling to say the least I’m not sure if I like it or not yet. Its different thats for sure. When we finished all I could say for a couple minutes was I feel like you just took  my second virginity hahahaha.

Well I can cross another thing off my list I guess.

Tent Sex


So I am definitely not the girl that you look at and think yep she is super outdoorsy butttt I did go camping for the first time last week. Not only did I go camping but I went camping with Mr. Whitewater! I seriously had the best time who knew camping was so much fun. The best part though was the tent sex.

So we were all sitting around passing a bottle of Makers smoking hookah and talking, I was sitting between his knees and he was playing with my hair. At some point he reaches around and pulls me into his lap and whispers lets go to bed. He takes my hand and I follow him to our little tent. (Side note: it was kinda hot watching him be all mountain man like, setting up the tent using an ax to chop wood and then building a fire). We get in the tent and he starts kissing my neck. Thats about the point I busted out laughing because we could hear the people next to us having sex! They were not the least bit concerned with not being loud. This kinda ruined our mood not because we could hear them but because I wanted to go stop them from hooking up. Before you judge me and call me a cock block hear me out… the girl in the tent has a boyfriend that lives in Ireland. I know she is super into him but he was blackout drunk and lets be serious when you are that drunk and you want it well there isn’t much stopping you. Anyway Mr. Whitewater said to let them go that they were both adults and knew what they were doing, thats also about the time his hands slide into my shorts. Needless to say I forgot about the other couple pretty quick.

The thing about tent sex is there really isn’t much room so we had to a little creative lol. If any of y’all ever find yourselves in a went having sex the best position is girl on top. Oh yea and put a fan in the tent! So I’m on top of him and we are in this little tent and its raining out basically it was kinda like the movies but sluttier haha! The last time I looked at the clock that night it was 5:30am and that was between rounds one and two. Yea I got next to no sleep but it was so worth it. Also between the rounds we stepped out of the tent into the rain to cool off and yes it was cheesy but still kind of cute… He pulled me into his arms and kissed me really deeply in the pouring rain. Swoon haha. I’m not kidding sometimes I think this guy stepped right out of a movie with some of the things he says and does. So far everything with him is really good but Mr. Cali is still in the back of mind… I might have to vent about that here soon so I’m just going to say sorry now! Until next time..

Risky Business Style

First off Mr. Off Limits is getting a new name since that one no longer fits and I’m going with Cali Boy because thats where he is from. Lol now that that is settled lets talk about last night…

I go out with some co-workers for a beer after work. Around 730 I get a call and its Cali Boy he wants to know if I want to go to Triple C to grab a beer and a grilled cheese from the Papi Queso. OF COURSE I DID! First of all I really can’t get enough of this boy secondly I love that brewery and that food truck. We were wrapping up where I was so I agreed to meet him. We meet up and he drives to the brewery. We have a few beers, get our grilled cheese and just talk. I could talk to him for hours about anything and everything. He even managed to calm me down when my sent sent me a text that sent my stress levels through the roof. Since its a brewery last call was at 9 so we headed back to his place pretty early.

He had to take his dog out when we got there and while he was doing that I walked in his closet, stripped and put on one of his white dress shirts and my heels, risky business style (with no socks or sunglasses). I heard him open the front door so i walked out of his room, the look on his face was priceless to say the least. He takes the leash off the dog in record time and before I knew it he picked me up and put me on the counter. It was on from there. We did finally make it to his bed but not before he had pinned me to every wall along the way. We had that hair pulling, back scratching kind of sex. The best part about sex with him is that he can get me more than once. Thankfully his room mate wasn’t home because he definitely would have heard us… well he would have heard me. We did finally pass out but at some point in the middle of the night, I’m getting woken up by a hand between my legs. Round 2…

I’ll meet you in the middle

It was a weekend for the books to say the least. My liver pretty much hates actually I’m sure it has just decided to quit on me. But on a better note Mr. Off Limits is so off limits any more!

Saturday was spent drinking and dancing the night away for Blakley’s birthday. By 2:30 me and another friend we in a cab heading back to my apartment. Some how we ended up in Mr. Off Limits apartment instead of mine, go figure.

I can’t even begin to tell you what we all talked about but his room mate watched him and I go into his room together and its not like it matter much because he was in the process of taking my friend into his room. Yep thats right she had sex with someone she knew I slept with this summer. I’m not even mad about it because thanks to her now he knows that Mr. (not so) Off Limits and I have a thing. Sex from what I remember was amazing like always.

The next morning I wake up and check my phone and see like 5 messages from my friend in the other room saying she needed to go, my only response was “I’ll meet you in the middle”. I got up and searched for my clothes yes I had to search they were everywhere and then went to sit on the couch to wait for her to come out of the other room. We got a good laugh out this.

The best part of the morning though was when we were getting in the car to get brunch, this girl and guy walk out of the building and past our car. She was wearing his shirt, his shorts and had her leopard print heels on from the night before. And they didn’t get in a car they were walking towards the light rail! Hahahaha talk about the best walk of shame outfit everrrr! It would have been better if she would have worn her outfit from last night or just borrowed  flip flops from him. Regardless  if was the best way to start off one hell of a Sunday Funday.